Wednesday, May 12, 2010

S1N1 Defined

By Jonathan Schramm
Assistant Director
Undergraduate Admissions

Everyone has heard of H1N1, right? But have you ever heard of S1N1?

S1N1, also known as Senioritis, is a curious, seasonal virus that creeps into high schools all across America around this time of year. It is curious in that it seems to affect only one population of students: Seniors who have finally figured out where they’re going to college, and are just too excited to worry about piddly old high school anymore. Keep on the look out for the symptoms future Virginia Tech students. And get your vaccinations now! S1N1 is highly contagious.

The symptoms are as follows:

- Shortness of Breath – resulting from skipping through the halls with your Virginia Tech t-shirt on, thinking of nothing but coming to campus.

- Hallucinations – people everywhere start looking like orange and maroon turkeys.

- Sudden Verbal Outbursts – as you shout “Let’s Go!” and, when your friends look at you strangely and do not return your call, you say “Hokies!” in reply.

- Fainting Spells – resulting from thoughts of cheering on the Hokies at Lane Stadium in a sea of orange and maroon.

- Blurred Vision – as you get so psyched for college you can barely see straight!

The only cure for S1N1 is the knowledge that your admission to Virginia Tech is based on satisfactory completion of your current coursework, and that Virginia Tech reserves the right to revoke your admission even after we receive your final high school transcripts.

You never know when S1N1 will strike. So be warned seniors, wash your hands and remain ever diligent. We look forward to seeing you in the fall!